Don't go
by Seirin
Summary: Nightmares are an unpleasant reality for Scouting Legion. But some nights are worse than other ones and much time passes before the sleep comes.


I'm warning you that English isn't my mother tongue, so be ready for errors ;)

* * *

'Hannes, what are you doing?!' A piercing shriek of Eren made her heart beat even more faster out of fear, when she felt that Hannes lifted her with one hand.

'Thank you.' She heard a silent voice of woman, who loved her through all those years in place of her own mother.

'Mom is still trapped in here!' Screams of her foster brother painfully made her realize what was going to happen in few minutes. Destroyed buildings permeated in happy memories started to swirl before her eyes. It was happening once again…

'Eren! Mikasa! Live on!'

She couldn't see her face. But she didn't have to turn her head around to know that when Carla Jeager uttered her last wish, in gaze, always so full of life, appeared despair and fear. Longing for what was going to be taken away from her forever.

Why did this world have to be so cruel?

She was far away when the titan approached ruins of her home. But she couldn't get rid of thought that before a hand of the monster grasped the tiny body of its victim, the woman whispered once again:

'Don't go.'

Light redness mixed slowly with dark greenness. Unconscious gaze of Eren surrounded by streams of blood hovering in the air fell on her. She screamed calling his name, but she knew very well it wasn't going to help her. In fraction of second a limp silhouette of the boy disappeared in the jaw of female titan. Speechless she watched how the monster without any hesitation started to run away.

'Eren… Wait…' She muttered.

She couldn't move and with every second the distance between her and Eren was getting greater and greater.

'Don't go…'

* * *

She woke up drenched in sweat. Her heart beat definitely too fast, which made her breathing harder. Only thanks to hearing Sasha's snoring did she realize that she is in the quarter of Scouting Legion. It was just a dream. Eren was perfectly safe.

Slowly her eyes got used to the darkness and her pulse was back to normal. She turned over and closed her lids trying to calm her thoughts in order to fall asleep once again. Quickly it became clear that despite the fact her nightmare was over, it left within her uneasiness she couldn't get rid of, which made her unable to sleep. After several minutes she got up, sighing heavily and left the room. She started to go along a corridor illuminated only by few candelabra. Reaching a bedroom of Armin and Eren didn't take her much time. She only wanted to see him. For one moment to calm down her nerves. She pushed gently a handle and opened silently a wooden door. In the light of candles she saw his raising chest. 'See? He is safe.' She told herself. But why couldn't she get rid of this overwhelming uneasiness?

'Isn't it what you would call an obsession?' Suddenly she heard an unpleasant but familiar, male voice. She closed the door nervously and abashed looked in direction of the short corporal, the only person who could move so silently and surprise her like that.

'I…' She stammered. She didn't want to explain herself, but she knew how this situation could be interpreted.

His scrutinizing gaze fell on her. If it weren't for her embarrassment and tiredness she could have noticed that bags under his eyes were larger than normally.

'Nightmares?' He asked simply.

Something in his voice made her attitude change. In those two words she heard what she needed and what made her loosen up: understanding.

When she nodded she saw with her peripheral vision that the man had thrown something in her direction. Thanks to her inborn reflex she caught easily the small object. Confused she found in her hands a used piece of cloth. She gave the corporal a questioning look.

'If you polish tiles in the kitchen so that they would reflect a light of a candle, you should be able not to think about anything.'

For a moment the girl was silent pondering those words.

'I should be… Does it mean it doesn't always work?'

'Exactly, but it doesn't change the fact it often helps. Goodnight.' He said and disappeared in the darkness of the corridor.

Mikasa for a moment looked at the piece of cloth and a minute later she went in direction of the kitchen.

* * *

Hanji didn't have to turn around in order to find out who was visiting her so late at night. Only one person had the habit of entering her room without knocking in the middle of the night.

'Why aren't you asleep, Glasses?' She heard a gruff voice which could belong only to the short corporal.

'You won't guess!' She answered with her usual enthusiasm. 'I was about to go to sleep when I had a revelation! I may be able to explain the hardening ability of the female titan. Do you want to listen?'

'Tomorrow.'

In a fit of agitation resulting from a new discovery she didn't pay attention to the fact that something disturbing appeared in Levi's voice.

'But tomorrow is today, actually!' She responded cheerfully. 'If I analyzed a composition of this rock right know, perhaps I would have an answer in the morning!'

'Hanji. Tomorrow.'

'There is no time to wast… Levi what are you doing?' She asked surprised when the dark haired man wordlessly took off her glasses and with one swift motion he put her over his shoulder. 'Levi?'

His silence made her stop asking next questions. For a moment she forgot about her revelation and tried analyzing behavior of the corporal during this short visit. When he laid her on the soft bed she looked closely at his face. Larger than usual bags under his eyes, the lack of verbal offence, not calling her even once Shitty Glasses or Fucking Four Eyes… A second later she knew why he came and what was he expecting from her.

'This analysis can wait… Maybe I am a bit sleepy after all…' She stated casually, but in the middle of saying those words aloud she felt a wave of sleepiness. She laid her head on the pillow and waited for the sound of blowing after which the room was wrapped by darkness. Moment later two strong arms wrapped around her, pulling her close to him.

'Nightmares?' She asked softly.

The man didn't answer. There was no such a need. It was more than enough when she felt his body was loosening up. She knew that after several minutes his breathing would became steady and the desired sleep would come. It had always been like that. When their nightmares had been becoming harder than normal, no words could have relieved them. In this reality they couldn't make promises they would never go away, because it would be a perjury. They couldn't say that dream was only a dream, because they knew that every nightmare could became a vision of a disaster happening the following day. They couldn't say everything was going to be all right, because they were aware it would be a lie.

The Scouting Legion was sometimes called the Suicide Legion or the Legion of Fools. Especially the last part was painfully true. The group of people ready for death in the name of humanity, believing in an idea of a single man. Nourished by hope, being aware there was no way to check if it was false or not. Forced to get up after every painful fall. Yes, they did were fools, because they believed that one day when they heard pleading call "Don't go.", they would be able to answer: "I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying here. Next to you.". But only fools swimming against the current could make changes. Making miracles the reality.


End file.
